Holy Mother Church offers us a shorter version of that
Second Reading from St. Paul’s Letter to the Ephesians. The shorter version skips the first part that says twice: “Wives should be subordinate to their husbands…” Many preachers don’t want to touch that with a ten-foot
pole. Perhaps they think it seems old-fashioned or out of touch. However, when we take the time to unpack it, we see how
beautiful it is. In fact, if it is properly unpacked, every young woman
preparing for marriage would insist on using this reading at her wedding.
The problem is, there have been guys over the centuries who
have quoted: “Wives should be subordinate to their husbands…” And then they follow it up with something like: “See, you
have to obey me.” Or “You have to serve me.” When we take a closer look at the reading we see who is
actually supposed to be serving whom. These men have to read on to the next sentence.
“Husbands love your wives, even as Christ loved the church…” How did Christ love the Church? The crucifix is our reminder. Jesus is not pleasing himself but rather spending himself
for the good of his bride, the Church. If this is how men are called to love their wives, in
imitation of Christ, men must forgo pleasing themselves and spend themselves for
the good of their wives. Christ lays down his life for his bride, the Church. Men are likewise to lay down their lives for their brides.
St. Paul tells us in the reading as he continues explaining
how Christ loved the Church. And remember, this is how husbands are to imitate him in
loving their wives. St. Paul says Jesus handed himself over for her to sanctify
her…” He continues with a few more descriptors: cleansing her, in
splendor, without spot or wrinkle, holy, without blemish.
So the loving husband is going to lay down his life for his
bride, serving her instead of himself, making her holy and whisking her off to the
joy of Heaven for eternity. What woman would not want to be subordinate to a man with
this as his life’s agenda?
