“I will surely return to you about this time next year, and
Sarah will then have a son.” This was
good news for Abraham and Sarah. Children
were seen as a blessing. Sterility was seen
as a curse. But notice how this has
flip-flopped in our culture. The
opposite is often the case. Human
fertility is seen as a curse rather than a blessing. Fertility is seen as a liability. The culture says something must be done about
the fertility monster.
Today begins Natural Family Planning awareness week. So, in this week we are given the opportunity
to remind ourselves that new human life is a blessing, not a curse. Fertility is a gift from God, not a
liability. He invites husbands and wives
to be co-creators with him; what an awesome responsibility and privilege. Nobody denies the fact that sacrifices will
have to be made for each new life. But
sacrifice is the Christian way. The
cross is our reminder. Christian history
is 2,000 years of sacrifice and generosity.
But notice how it has deep roots in the Jewish faith. In our first reading from Genesis, we heard
that Abraham and Sarah were extremely generous and hospitable with three
complete strangers. Later they were
credited for having entertained angels. We
are called to no less. We are reminded
today that we are to be extremely generous and hospitable as well. We also will be recognized as having cared
for God’s little angels. If everything
is a gift from God, how could we not be generous gift givers ourselves?
Now, why NFP awareness this week? We are commemorating the 45th
anniversary of the encyclical of Pope Paul VI, Humanae Vitae. In this encyclical
in 1968, Pope Paul VI made some predictions on what would happen if the use of artificial
contraception became widespread.
All of his predictions came true. In these 45 years, we have seen a general lowering
of morality with the destruction of youth and family. We have seen a proliferation of
out-of-wedlock births, and single-parent families. We have seen a great increase in venereal
diseases. And we have seen an increase
in marital infidelity, divorce, and spousal abuse.
Finally, what’s further repulsive is that our government is
now forcing organizations to pay for the very things that help bring about the
decline of our society and calling it healthcare. I was recently talking to an elderly
gentleman who was a child during the Second World War He told me he remembers hearing about Hitler
promoting the sterilization of certain groups of people, and how he just can’t
believe that our own government has gotten in that business.
Yes contraception is a problem because it’s unhealthy for
the human body, but it’s especially problematic because of the harm it can do
to relationships. Human biology shows us
that the conjugal embrace brings about two physical things: new life, and unity
of the couple: procreative and unitive dimensions, if you will. It’s procreative because it’s God’s way of
bringing new human life into the world. And
it’s unitive because it’s God’s way of bonding a man and woman in married love
for the rest of their lives. People who
are open to both unitive and procreative meanings of the conjugal embrace are
presumably giving themselves fully to each other. There is a full self-giving for the benefit
of the other. Sounds like love, doesn’t
it? Nothing is held back, not even
fertility.
When a barrier is placed in the way, there is no longer a
full self-giving. Now something is held
back. We would never say to a spouse, “I
love you except for your fertility. Hold
back that part of you.” So we shouldn’t
say it in our actions either.
So we see that in diminishing the procreative meaning will take the risk of diminishing the unitive meaning of the conjugal embrace as well. Imposing barriers in this most intimate of settings can quite often manifest itself in emotional ways too. If the physical barriers are in the way, it becomes easier to put up emotional barriers or communication barriers as well.
As human beings, we are designed to have a very powerful
unitive bond, but we can do things to diminish it. The worst thing about contraception and
sterilization is that they reject God and his plan for our happiness. Furthermore the contraceptive mentality feeds
the despair of the culture that new life is a curse. But life is a gift and a blessing. Natural Family Planning keeps the unitive and
procreative meanings of the conjugal embrace intact while effectively helping
married couples space children if they prayerfully discern they have a grave
reasons to do so. NFP is more effective
than contraception but without the destructive side-effects. And it has proven to enhance marital love
rather than diminish it. It forces the
husband and wife to communicate, thus building their relationship, rather than
taking the risk of using the other for selfish reasons. I just heard new data on statistic this week
that reinforced what I heard several years ago:
Married couples who are not contracepting have the most satisfying sex
lives. Of course; it’s God’s plan.
It makes sense.
Today’s gospel tells us Mary sat beside the Lord at his feet
listening to him speak. Martha was
anxious and worried. Martha is busy
working her own agenda. Her trivial
distractions take her away from his presence.
Obviously something is a little off in her soul. She even tells God what to do, saying to the
Lord: “Tell her to help me.” We are called to be Mary and sit beside the
Lord at his feet and listen to him speak.
He is still speaking to us through his Church, and his way is the way
that works. Jesus says, “There is need
of only one thing.” We hear what that
one thing is in the Psalm today: to live I the presence of the Lord.
Christ is still trying to teach us something very good
through his Church. Will we sit beside
him at his feet and listen, or will we reject him? The invitation is here for us to learn what
the Church teaches and why. And we all
know people who need to learn it as well.
Let’s have the courage to trust in the Lord and invite others to the
happiness that only he can bring.
